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Anyone own a semi automatic rifle?

I prefer a big knife.
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I lost my only musket kayaking in the river outside of an Alaskan village while I was camping on the ice photographing polar bear triplets for national geographic foundation last night and I reported the mishap to the Canadian authorities so they can sue the Nigerian government for environmental damage because they made the nitrogen powder that was in the musket. This is my confession for the environmental damage caused by my carelessness while fishing for polar bears in the savannah.....
 
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