I’ve had good luck with newer shooters looking for carry guns when I show them a J-frame.
Start with a 43C in .22; when that goes well, move up to a 3” 36 shooting lightly loaded wad cutters. When that goes well, try a 642 with a full grip, shooting standard velocity loads.
Oh—I never tell them that a snub is “an expert’s gun”, either.
As for bullet performance...well, there are some loads that perform decently. I prefer the FBI Load 158gr+P LSWC-HP, mostly. It gets proper penetration, and if it doesn’t expand, it still cuts a good size channel due to the sharp shoulder. It also shoots to POA out of steel frame models.