Verbally De-Escalating a Critical Incident

[Talyn]

Scenario: You find yourself in a critical self-defense situation where you MIGHT need to use deadly force... Is there anything you can do to avoid that extreme response? Jeff recommends taking steps to (1) prevent escalating the situation and, if possible (2) de-escalate it. Your verbal communication should be clear and concise.

Try to understand the "problem," the other person's concern. If you understand, you're less likely to do something that will set off the person and escalate the situation. This may help calm them down and encourage them to also work to de-escalate. Try to seek a resolution: How can we work something out so we both walk away intact? It helps to adopt nonviolent postures, so you're not threatening the other person BUT your hands are positioned to quickly protect yourself (that is, protect your head). You can also use hand gestures to signal your desire for de-escalation. Most importantly, you have to stay calm; if YOU get agitated and lose your cool, your opponent will respond, and things can escalate quickly.

 

[Bloodknight]

In my travels through life. I have found that almost all people are not fighters. Today's society seems to be made up of predators and sheep. Lots and lots of predators out there.They arent fighters , just predators. To write something on paper to prepare people to fight does not work. I have in my lifetime seen people who were born natural fighters. Most of us have to prepare. By failing to prepare. You are preparing to fail. Altercations happen in an instant. Every situation is unique. The only thing I personally know for sure is this. To decide in your mind the outcome of a combat situation whlle it is in progress is to invite defeat. There is a Japanese word for it "One Mind" focus on the task at hand and only that

 

[Bassbob]

In my travels through life. I have found that almost all people are not fighters. Today's society seems to be made up of predators and sheep. Lots and lots of predators out there.They arent fighters , just predators. To write something on paper to prepare people to fight does not work. I have in my lifetime seen people who were born natural fighters. Most of us have to prepare. By failing to prepare. You are preparing to fail. Altercations happen in an instant. Every situation is unique. The only thing I personally know for sure is this. To decide in your mind the outcome of a combat situation whlle it is in progress is to invite defeat. There is a Japanese word for it "One Mind" focus on the task at hand and only that

I disagree with that Japanese proverb. If it is one. At least The Book of 5 Rings disagrees with it. If it truly is a combat situation I have already decided what the outcome is. I win. At all costs. Period.
The first part of your post I totally agree with. The majority of situations where people encounter someone who forces them to use violence, the perpetrator is looking for a victim. They aren't looking to get their own blood pooling on the ground. It's almost a parallel to the truth we all know that the guy who talks about what a bad ass he is probably isn't a bad ass. Big guys go through life being able to bully weak minded people so most of them really are terrible fighters. That's a fact.